Welcome to 'Attic of the Heart'!

Welcome from north-central Connecticut! In this blog I will share whatever is in my heart, on my mind, or something interesting I've found to share. Thanks for stopping by!


Tuesday, February 12, 2008

February cabin fever and mid winter blues...

February....the joys of midwinter. Cabin Fever. That must be it. I must have a case of cabin fever. Feeling frustrated, unfocused, pointless, fat. Yup. Cabin fever.

I went for a walk yesterday and nearly froze my legs off. That wind can bite! My husband laughed when I told him I went for a walk. 'Yup - picked the coldest day of the year to start her exercise program. That's my wife!' he said.

Oh well. Hopefully I can motivate myself to get back out there today before the next storm hits. Looks like we are going to get another snow/ice/freezing rain storm tonight and tomorrow. Oh joy. The last bad one broke a lot of branches off, big and small. Going to be a big spring clean up, I can see that coming. I think it's time we invested in a chain saw.

Then again...maybe not. When we bought a hand saw, my husband went around seeing what he could use it on. He was bound and determined to cut the posts off our canopy bed so it would fit under the eaves. Fortunately, I managed to convince him otherwise. Disaster averted. Usually he isn't like that, but I guess he got a bit carried away. :0))

Pretty quiet otherwise. Kinda boring actually. All this talk nowadays of how busy people are, and here I sit. No kids at home anymore. I'm not working at the moment. Oh, there's lots to do. One could clean house till the cows come home. I have so many crafts on the go I could work on them for a year likely without going to buy more craft supplies.

My biggest problem is lack of motivation. I really need to get out more. Since we are fairly new here, we really haven't made any friends yet. A few acquaintances, co-workers, and the hardware people recognize me, but that's about it. It seems harder nowadays to find ways to meet people. The church we go to is really big. Two services, over 600 people in each service. Not like we were used to, 300 + people at the most in one service, plus we had spent years in that community, so we knew people before we even went.

It's hard when you move so far away from all your family to a new area. We are not real outgoing people, but we are friendly. I will talk to most anyone. I guess that comes from having moved so much, you realize it may be the only opportunity for a bit of fellowship, so you make the most of it. Even if it is the repairman, cable guy or the nice lady at the CVS.

My neighbors are nice and polite enough, but busy with their own lives. They go about their business and let you go about yours. They have their friends and families, and apparently there are no more openings in those departments. Not hiring.

Sometimes, it seems you are sized up, asked a few pertinent questions to see if you measure up, like "Do you have any kids?" (Nope. If they do, that's a negative on your side) "Where do you work?" (If it isn't in management or a big well known company (like aeronautic or something exciting,) you drop another peg down the ladder. You are swiftly analyzed, categorized, and then ranked on the 'need to get to know better' list. Do I do that? In retrospect, I guess I do sometimes. Not in a snobby way, but in a 'what do we have in common' way. In some areas here, it seems it's a matter of the 'haves and have nots'. We lament the fact that the middle class seems to be disappearing. Not only that, but people are so 'busy' now with their own lives, that there isn't room for socializing any more. Not like it was years ago.

Spoke with a mortgage broker yesterday. We got to talking, and I discovered that her mom was from Saskatchewan. We had lived in Calgary, AB, and had passed through there, so could relate somewhat. She asked me, 'How do you like it here?' I said, 'OK. Connecticut is a beautiful state. Wonderful growing season.' (I am a gardener). Then she said ' But people aren't as friendly here.' Wow! I didn't even have to say it. 'Yes, I have found that. People are polite, but kinda reserved.' She agreed, and said that even coming from Saskatchewan, she found a difference. I wonder why that is...
I read a couple of years ago in the paper an article about a couple who moved here from the Midwest to southern CT. They lived here 3 years, then gave up and moved back. They said they didn't make any friends in those 3 years. They said that people here were 'not friendly'.

I know exactly what that couple meant. If they were from the Midwest, then indeed, these CT people would seem 'not as friendly', for people from the Midwest are generally very open, friendly, and helpful. I know. I grew up there.

The same can be said for most of Maine. They are so friendly that when you go into a convenience store, the clerk is usually more than willing to shoot the breeze with you. Here, you get a strange look, a couple of words in reply, and that's it. Like, you must not be from here. Yup, you're right. I'm not.

Having lived in mid Maine and northern Maine both, as well as western NB. I can honestly say, those people, while they have their faults, love to talk to you. New people are exciting to them. (OK. I will concede that is probably so because most people move AWAY from up there, so anyone moving TO there is indeed a novelty. :0)) Some do have that 'Maine cliquishness' that is mentioned in different articles, but really, they are generally a people of a generous and giving nature.

Are there people here that way? I'm sure there are. But, IMO, I think because there are so many people moving in and out of CT now, that a lot of the 'older' CT'ers are somewhat suspicious, or think, what's the point, they will just move on again, so why bother. Is that it?

Maybe it's that I have that 'new car smell'. You know. That 'you aren't from here' thing, so I can't really identify with you yet'.

It seems doubly hard for renters. It makes you seem so transient. And without kids at home to help connect to other parents, it kind of leaves you out in the cold.

Oh well...I do like it here in CT, and will continue to try to make friends. It will happen some day. I am just not as 'needy' as when I first came here. And I was needy. I was hurting from past events, and really needed a friend. But maybe I scared them off. That is very possible.

But I think I am ready now. Not so needy now..right??...